Getting Over an Ex

Let's talk about relationship but make it about exes. How to get over your ex? Can you even get over your ex? Well, if you ask me, it is not the same for everyone. Some took a while to fully moved on from their ex. It could be months or years and some, although they have fully gotten over their past relationships, they may experience permanent scars or changes in themselves. Another question is how do you know that you have really gotten over your ex? These questions have been in my head for these past few minutes. So, let me lay out my thoughts here for anyone of you to read. As a reminder, what I wrote is not self help article nor it can provide you with any answers to the questions above but I hope that you will enjoy reading my writing. So... Let's start.

Recently, a friend of mine went to a talk and he met my ex there. At first, when his name was brought up (I am referring to my ex here), I felt a bit weird. I don't really know what I was feeling, more like I don't know what I should be feeling. The name that used to mean so much to me felt so foreign. Then I realised, talking about him does not hurt anymore. Talking about him does not bring any flashbacks to when we were together. There is no hints of negativity at all. Fast forward to a few days later, I asked my friend about my ex, of how he was doing, if he is happy and healthy. I felt glad knowing that he is doing okay in life and there was not a single moment that got me feeling any hard feelings. It just feel so freeing and I realised that I have gotten over my ex perfectly well. But I am aware that that is not the case for everyone.

Now I am in an eight months relationship with someone new and I am still head over heels for him. His previous relationship lasted for 3 years before it came to an end. It makes me wonder if he has completely moved on from his ex. 3 years is not a short time and they have experienced a lot together throughout those 3 years. A thought crept into my mind, "What if she still has a place in her heart?". Then I figured that even if that was true, it is okay. If whatever they had was true, it would not be easy to just delete everything about them and what they had together. It is okay for him to still have memories of his ex because you could never go back and change the past, and I believe that his past relationships are what that have taught him how to love better. He has proven his love towards me through his actions and I know that I am the one he wants to be with (at least for now). It is hard to get over your ex but you don't have to rush it. Or maybe you don't have to got over them at all as they were the important parts that shaped you to become the person you are right now. I am not really sure what I am trying to prove here but when a person love you, you will know. Even with exes or without.